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Selfish Parenting

Hosted by Selfish Parenting

A podcast that reframes prioritizing parental needs as a sustainable and healthy way to raise a family, challenging the myth of maternal self-sacrifice.

The brief

This is a weekly podcast that serves as a manifesto for modern mothers who feel let down by the ideal of the selfless parent. Host Shansé Hinder-Lane combines personal narrative, especially her experiences with corporate America and leaving the Christian church, with expert interviews to dismantle societal expectations. Episodes tackle thorny topics like the mental load, the true cost of marriage for women, and religious trauma, arguing for a model of motherhood rooted in self-preservation.

The show's power comes from its unapologetic "selfish" framing, which reclaims the word as a positive act of sustainability. Unlike many parenting podcasts, it directly confronts uncomfortable truths about marriage, religion, and systemic failures, with the host's own vulnerability and background as a Black woman in corporate America adding a crucial layer of authenticity.
— What makes it distinctive
§1 · The host

Who hosts this show

Hosted by Shansé Hinder-Lane, Selfish Parenting flips the script on traditional parenting advice, arguing that taking care of yourself is the best way to take care of your family. Through a mix of solo episodes and guest interviews, she explores the "selfish" behaviors—like hiring help, setting boundaries, and prioritizing mental health—that research suggests lead to better parenting. The show is a permission slip for parents, particularly mothers, to shed guilt and build a life that doesn't require them to put themselves last.

AI-extracted bio · help us verify· Source: gemini-video-grounded

Credentials & credits

  • Founder and President of Empower Her Village
  • B.A. in Political Science with a focus on International Relations and Nuclear Policy
  • MBA candidate at The George Washington University
  • Former Capitol Hill aide
  • Nuclear sourcing expert managing government contracts
  • Content creator and public speaker

Other ventures

  • Empower Her Village (nonprofit supporting mothers)
  • Content creation via @hindirlane on Instagram and TikTok
§2 · Classification

What kind of podcast

§3 · Cadence & catalog

When new episodes drop

§3b · Editor's picks

Notable episodes

AI-extracted picks + commentary · help us verify
  1. 01
    Unpacking Church Trauma & Refusing to Raise my Daughters in Shame

    A powerful solo episode where the host shares her personal story of leaving organized religion due to modesty culture and sexual shaming, defining a core pillar of her parenting philosophy.

  2. 02
    Is Marriage Worth It for Women? Feat. Yvette Henry of How Married Are You? Podcast

    This episode exemplifies the show's interview format and its willingness to ask provocative questions about institutions women are expected to aspire to.

  3. 03
    69% Of women are asking for Divorce | The Mental Load with Paige Connell

    Directly tackles the concept of the 'mental load,' a central theme of the podcast, and offers practical discussion on a topic highly relevant to the target audience.

§4 · Signature

What you'll be asked on this show

AI-extracted from recent episodes · help us verify
How Selfish Parenting interviews

The host, Shansé Hinder-Lane, begins interviews by expressing genuine admiration for her guest's work, creating a respectful and warm atmosphere. She often frames the conversation with a statistic or a provocative question, then uses her own life experiences to build a peer-to-peer rapport rather than a formal Q&A. She probes for deeper insight by asking direct, personal questions like "Is marriage worth it for you?" and follows up with "Why?" to get beyond surface-level answers. She frequently validates her guests' points by relating them to her own struggles with cultural upbringing or unsustainable expectations.

The show alternates between solo, narrative episodes where the host unpacks a personal experience or belief, and long-form guest interviews. The host's style is warm, empathetic, and conversational, often feeling like a talk with a trusted friend who brings receipts in the form of statistics and studies. Episodes frequently open with a teaser clip from the interview before a signature musical intro.

Questions Selfish Parenting keeps coming back to

8 catalogued

If you're going on this show as a guest, expect some version of each of these. Each note explains when Selfish Parenting reaches for it.

origin

2
  1. Q.01

    How did you get started as a content creator or author?

    The host often asks this early on to establish the guest's origin story and professional context.

  2. Q.02

    What personal space were you in when you decided to start this work?

    This question seeks to uncover the personal catalyst or struggle that led to the guest's public work.

process

1
  1. Q.01

    Why did you decide to be so vulnerable and share your personal story publicly?

    Used to explore the guest's motivation for transparency and the process of sharing difficult experiences.

personal

1
  1. Q.01

    What does your life look like day-to-day, outside of your public work?

    This question grounds the conversation by contrasting the guest's public persona with their private reality as a mother.

advice

2
  1. Q.01

    How do you balance your career, motherhood, and personal time?

    A core question that directly addresses the central theme of the podcast, seeking practical strategies.

  2. Q.02

    What would you say to women who feel that [common objection to your advice]?

    This question proactively addresses listener skepticism and allows the guest to counter common pushback.

values

1
  1. Q.01

    Is [marriage/a traditional path] personally worth it for you?

    A signature, direct question that cuts to the heart of many of the show's discussions on societal expectations.

mindset

1
  1. Q.01

    Do you believe parenting is something you can ever truly clock out of?

    A philosophical question designed to explore the guest's mindset on the all-encompassing nature of motherhood.

Signature segments

  • · Intro Tagline: "Welcome to Selfish Parenting, the podcast that gives you permission to be well, a little selfish, while raising incredible children."

Topics covered repeatedly

The Mental LoadMotherhood and IdentityMarriage and PartnershipsReligious TraumaSetting BoundariesChildcare and Support SystemsFemale Ambition and CareerBody AutonomyFinancial Independence for WomenGentle Parenting
§5 · Guests

Who gets booked here

AI-extracted guest list + profile · help us verify
Typical guest

Guests are typically female authors, podcasters, and content creators who have built a platform by sharing their expertise or personal stories related to motherhood, relationships, and self-development. They are often experts in navigating challenges like the mental load, financial inequality in partnerships, or rebuilding a life after trauma.

Recent guests
  • Yvette Henry
    on Is Marriage Worth It for Women? Feat. Yvette Henry of How Married Are You? Podcast
  • Paige Connell
    on 69% Of women are asking for Divorce | The Mental Load with Paige Connell of @sheisapaigeturner
  • Kiana Leroux
    on Social Media Is Not Real | What I Was Posting While My Life Was Falling Apart with Kiana Leroux
  • Trish A. White
    on Tradwife or Trapped Wife? | How Stay-at-Home Moms Can Protect Themselves with Trish A. White
  • Julien Lane
    on More Than a Paycheck: What a Modern Provider Actually Looks Like feat. Julien Lane
§6 · Channels & links

Where to find this show

§7 · Stats

Audience & reach

YouTube · first-party
Subscribers
1.1K
1,120
Avg views / video
729
Trailing window
Total views
61.6K
61,564
Videos published
55
Sponsor readEstimated

The podcast does not appear to feature third-party sponsors. Monetization seems to be driven by building a community around the host's personal brand and directing listeners to her own nonprofit, Empower Her Village, which supports mothers with resources like childcare and wellness support.

AI-extracted sponsor read · help us verify

Subscriber and view counts are pulled live from YouTube and re-verified on a 30-day cycle. Listener estimates for the RSS feed aren't published here unless they're host-verified.

§8 · Contact

Pitch Selfish Parenting

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Verified contact
Host / booking email
s•••@•••.co

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§9b · FAQ

People also ask

AI-extracted researched answers · help us verify
What is the host's name?
The host's name is Shansé Hinder-Lane.
What is the format of the show?
The podcast is a mix of solo, narrative episodes where the host discusses her personal experiences and beliefs, and long-form interviews with guests.
How often do new episodes come out?
New episodes are released weekly on Mondays.
Where can I listen to the podcast?
Selfish Parenting is available on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and other major podcast platforms.
What is Empower Her Village?
Empower Her Village is a nonprofit organization founded by the host, Shansé Hinder-Lane, to provide practical support for mothers, including childcare assistance, wellness resources, and household help.
Last updatedJun 29, 2026Not yet host-verified
Research depthDeep dossierHigh confidence · Jun 29, 2026 · gemini-2.5-pro

Built from the show's public RSS feed, YouTube, the host's own websites, and the cited sources below. Computed and AI-extracted fields are labelled. Facts only — no private info, no fabrication, no transcripts republished.

§9c · Methodology

Sources & how this page was built

This page is AI-assisted, grounded in the public sources cited below, and host-verifiable. We publish facts only; we do not republish transcripts. If anything here is wrong, the host can claim and correct the page above.Model: gemini-2.5-pro · high confidence

  1. [01]Official Websitehindirlane.com
  2. [02]Empower Her Villageempowerhervillage.org
  3. [03]Selfish Parenting on Apple Podcastspodcasts.apple.com
  4. [04]Selfish Parenting on Buzzsproutbuzzsprout.com
  5. [05]Selfish Parenting YouTube Channelyoutube.com
  6. [06]Host's Instagram (@hindirlane)instagram.com
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